Why can’t I do anything “productive” anymore?
Before grief: a sense of rhythm, a sense of control
Before the loss, you were always moving. You had a rhythm. Maybe not a perfect one, but at least a routine: wake up, get things done, check your list, show up. You didn’t have to think so hard to function.
And then grief hit — and your energy vanished.
Suddenly, the smallest things feel enormous. Your to-do list sits untouched. Your inbox grows by the hour. Even simple tasks like taking a shower or making breakfast feel like a mountain to climb.
When the shame starts creeping in
At first, you think it’s just a phase. Maybe you're just tired. But as days become weeks, and then months, you start wondering: "What’s wrong with me?"
You look at who you used to be — productive, active, capable — and now you can barely start. The shame creeps in. The frustration. The self-doubt. You blame yourself, thinking you're lazy, weak, or broken.
Grief doesn’t just live in the heart — it hijacks the body
Here’s the truth no one told you: grief doesn’t just affect your emotions — it hijacks your body.
It messes with your nervous system.
It clouds your brain.
It steals your motivation.
When you’re grieving, your body isn’t asking you to keep going — it’s begging you to slow down. It’s in survival mode. It’s trying to keep you safe — not make you productive.
This isn’t failure. It’s overload.
So of course you feel like you're stuck in molasses.
Of course you can’t “push through.”
You’re not failing — your body is just doing its best to carry something it was never designed to hold for so long.
This isn’t about laziness. It’s about overload.
The mental fog, the physical fatigue, the invisible weight in your chest — they all have a reason. And the reason isn’t weakness. It’s grief.
Understanding is a form of relief
That doesn’t mean you’ll stay here forever.
But it does mean you deserve to understand what’s happening — and stop blaming yourself for it.
Sometimes, naming it is the first real step forward.
Still grieving. Just Stronger.
I’m Rita, and I created Beyond after losing someone I loved deeply — and realizing my body was falling apart.
.. Doctors offered pills. Friends offered clichés.
.. But I needed something else.
So I studied the link between grief and the body — and I built this space to share everything I learned.
